Briefcase Informed Divorce - sponsored by Flexx Law, P.S.

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  Saving Your Marriage
  Washington State Law
  The Legal Process
  Choose your Attorney
  Working with your Attorney
  Save $ On Your Divorce
  Financial Planning
  Your Career Goals
  Ask the Professionals
  How to Negotiate

· Keeping children out of the middle
· Taking control
· Family functions affected by divorce
· Family Reactions to divorce
· Children's reaction
· Parenting
  Bringing It All Together - Professional Team Work
  Share Your Experience
  King County Resources
  Suggested Reading
  International Family Law
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  Site notes
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Emotional Side of Divorce - Keeping Children out of the middle

One of the truly heart rending aspects of divorce is to see parents putting their children in the middle of their dispute. Children are acutely aware of the bad feelings between the parents and this can affect them terribly. The follow are some of the “do’s” and “don’ts” that parents should observe:

1. Do not speak negatively about the other parent in front of the child. I know this is extremely difficult. Remember that the child loves BOTH of you.

2. Do not involve the child in passing messages or support payments or maintenance payment from one parent to the other. One of the reasons why this is not suitable is that if the child forgets and one parent becomes angered as a result, the child will feel responsible for heightening tensions between the parents.

3. Do not transfer children from one parent to another at unreasonable times, immediately before bedtime, as it is very difficult for the child to settle down to sleep, or during a mealtime. This can be very disruptive to the child’s sense of stability.

4. Do involve a therapist of school counselor to help your child during this process. It provides the child with a wonderful release and someone to talk to.